A Tiny Guide to GREAT Summer Sleep

We'll take it where/when we can get it.

Tiny Guides like this one are typically for Paid ATA subscribers—today’s post, however, is free, thanks to the generous support of Helix, makers of the very best mattresses for summertime + people who hold GREAT sleep with the highest regard. AND: We’ve got a Helix mattress giveaway today, so read on✨

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My mother loves to remind me of what a great sleeper I used to be. Particularly now, as I seem to talk about sleep (or lack thereof) more than I ever thought humanly possible. As a child, I had a lot of worries and, most evenings, would be filled with mounting dread, clutching my comforter like a cartoon character as I would hear everyone else, one by one, in the stillness of our home, happily/easily/blissfully falling asleep.

But not me.

It’s a likely reason I was always the last one awake in our family, staggering into the kitchen, disoriented, like I’d been drugged, long after everyone else had come/gone. I’m an early riser now, which helps me feel even more tired (ie: more able to fall asleep) when I start heading to bed around 9 p.m. This doesn’t mean I don’t still lie awake psychotically ruminating over pending blood test results, missing neighborhood pets, and whether or not I sent a thank-you note to so-and-so.

But now, instead of my worries being something to wrestle to the ground every night until my brain basically blacks out from overdrive, I’ve found ways to look forward to sleep. To enjoy it, even on the nights it doesn’t come as easily. And, mostly, to work with what I’ve got/what’s within my control to get the best sleep I can possibly get most nights of the week. So, ultimately, I can do a better job at all the other stuff, too.

I suspect someone is getting very good sleep here. Tony Liu of Diet Prada’s Brooklyn home in World of Interiors, photographed by Chris Mottalini.

I am a firm believer that the hour before bed and the first hour we are awake in the world are some of the most pivotal and day-shaping moments of our lives. In the morning, we begin again…a fresh start, even if it’s just in theory/attitude. At night, we have a conscious invitation to housekeep our brains with the events of the day, cherry-picking only the useful/pleasurable (read: hopeful/constructive:) bits to bring into bed with us.

My journal, which is more like a scrapbook/note/list-keeper, that I wake up with and go to bed with most nights. A reliable place to drop my wishes AND my worries.

As I’ve gotten older and sleep has become more precious and integral to how I function and feel, I know this to be true, too: Getting into a practice of sleep isn’t just about getting our bodies into a rhythm/pattern of rest and renewal. It’s about actively and devotedly pouring back into ourselves, restoring everything we gave away throughout the day—with our consent or not.

The habits of good sleep are as much about our own rituals of comfort and happiness, and honestly, just finding the smallest of ways to mother ourselves when we need it most. Vacations or short breaks from work, exercise, eating the best quality foods we can afford, and cutting out toxic stuff (ie: people, gossip, hurtful habits) from our lives are the goal posts of self-care. But on a micro level, just getting into a better groove with sleep can eclipse all that other stuff—because GREAT sleep automatically nourishes everything else we do + how we feel without even trying.

“Getting into a practice of sleep isn’t just about getting our bodies into a rhythm of rest and renewal. It’s about actively and devotedly pouring back into ourselves, restoring everything we gave away throughout the day—with our consent or not. ”

Now that it’s summer and it’s mostly hot, sleep gets trickier, specifically if you’re waging hormonal escapades like I am. I swear, just one degree on the air conditioner or a single truck horn splitting the night used to be my total undoing. But now that I’ve got tools (and fans and potions and pillow cases!), I sleep better. And I wake up happier, too.

I started out here breaking today’s story into Sleep Sections: Habits, Space, and Supplements…but the heart wants what it wants! So, I’m letting it flow and hope these 12’ish bits of wisdom/tips/resources help you get better sleep soon, too, so you can do more of what you love doing, even if that’s watching three back-to-back seasons of The Diplomat 🤙🏼 like I just did! Let’s get into it. xxCb

Raf’s bedroom, tiny but tidy. AKA: Behind every well-rested parent is a kid who probably gets decent sleep, too.

1. Start the day with something other than scrolling.

Last summer, I wrote about a program the artist Tom Sachs did with Nike based on the idea of Output Before Input. Meaning that upon waking, before we start taking anything in from the outside world—news notifications, messages, prompts—we give something. An entry in a journal. A tiny sketch. A written postcard to a friend. Holding a minute plank. Something that generates an outward gesture to create from a clear space, before all the external flotsam/jetsam starts pumping in. I don’t follow OBI every day, but I do it most days, and particularly on days I have a lot of shit to do and need to be sharp and focused for longer sustained periods of time, it helps. As a rule, it’s also great to do before bed; like unburdening your brain—things to do, worries on your mind, dreams to flag—into a notebook and off your subconscious. It helps me remember my dreams more often, too.

2. Know your bedtime comforts.

My husband loves to turn on this little lantern we bought in Helsinki about a decade ago. It’s not even so much about the toasty light it broadcasts; I think he just loves the routine of doing it as soon as the sun goes down. Above is the shelf where I keep my favorite incense, too (which I always burn after I vacuum), and the tiny IKEA speaker I am OBSESSED with that holds a charge for a long time and is just the little bump of sound I need when I’m sorting through my closet, reading, or listening to something moody/chill as I bring in our nighttime tea (song 👇 is a 50-minute pre-bedtime goodie). Also, I like a little TV, not all the time, but on nights when I feel like I need or want to take a bath and turn my brain off with something silly, immersive, or both. Some people don’t believe in 🚫 screens in the bedroom, I get it. But I think if it comforts you and gets you in the mood for rest, mind your business. Know YOUR tricks and treats. Have them at the ready in a place that you like to look at. This corner of our bedroom is that for me. ❤️

3. Invest in a GREAT mattress.**

Last year, I started talking to Helix about upgrading our mattress. They wanted to send us one to try out, and given we hadn’t invested in a new one since we moved into our Brooklyn apartment, I was intrigued.

To be fair, even though a good mattress factors HIGH on the list of things to fix if your sleep is suffering, the hassle of finding a quality design that suits your creature comforts/preferences can be so tedious. Sometimes, it’s just easier to live with what we’ve got. BUT…as soon as I read about Helix’s Sleep Quiz—I got it. Like, how could I care this much about improving my sleep quality and not even know the basics of what I actually need? Helix’s quiz (which is fun + quick) helped me understand our mutual mattress preferences, as well as the kind of sleep I was getting, as opposed to the sleep I really yearned for. Delivery and switch-out (they take the old one w/them) was mercifully simple, and to be honest, the mattress is so much MORE comfortable and luxurious than I could have imagined (my husband is now a convert, too). We landed on the Midnight Luxe—great for side-sleepers as well as people who run hot (its breathable fabrics and cooling technologies circumvent any 2 a.m. spontaneous combusting…ie: ME🔥). One more thing I love: Helix continues to invest in research to ensure people who need good sleep can actually get more of it (participants in one recent study shared that users with a Helix mattress on average got 25 more minutes of deep sleep, and for someone who suffers with inconsistent sleep, that’s a WIN).

Thank you, Helix, for reminding us that the right mattress really matters. Best part: Helix is gifting one ATA reader (based in the U.S. or Canada only) a new Helix mattress. Drop a comment below if you want to be in the running, and we’ll choose one of you at random within the week to receive a mattress of your choice, from either the Core or Luxe collections. And, for everyone else: Check out Helix’s exclusive July 4 sale to score 20% off site-wide. 🎆 **#helixpartner

4. Clean the parts of your bedroom you rarely think about, ie: the WINDOWS.

Commemorating our clean + tiny bedroom windows, always a balance of bird song, breezes, and rumbly truck toots.

A few weeks ago, I was lying in bed with Raffi in her room reading, and I noticed how dirty her window was. We live in Brooklyn/NYC, one of the soot capitals of the world, so most windows reveal layers of grime/dust/bird poop like a tree’s rings reveal its age. It was clear to me from the rings of gunk on her window that I had my work cut out for me. The next day, I blocked off the morning, and got to it—pulling all the window frames out and showering them down in our bathtub, watching the pitch black water swirl down the drain like ink (I really should have filmed it, SO disgusting AND satisfying). While the windows were drying, I vacuumed behind the headboard, under the dressers, and everywhere else I pretend isn’t there because I can’t easily reach it with a damp rag or vacuum nozzle. And, it felt soooo good. It made me remember what Karen Kingston always said in her book Creating Sacred Space with Feng Shui: That when we clean, we consecrate a space. We purify it and bless it. We move out all the old energy, hangups, sadness, grief, and make room for new energy to expand. After we put the windows back in, I saw Kevin sitting on our bed looking out the window, amazed, “I can’t believe what a huge difference it makes,” he said. And, it was no surprise to me that everyone in the house slept great that night, too.

5. Find your pills, potions, and teas. And keep testing out new ones to see which work best.

My current sleep stash. For now.

I am an equal-opportunity supplement tester. In the past year, I’ve tried numerous brands/kinds of magnesium, herbs, blends, drinks, even eating some plain yogurt before brushing my teeth after I read that many people wake up in the middle of the night not because they can’t sleep but because their digestion cycle is off track and it rouses them awake. To be fair, I think most of us have a mix of circumstances that impact our sleep—stress, hormonal shifts/peri/menopause, a “little someone” who wakes them up for water/bathroom breaks. Whatever the case may be, have a stock of pills/potions that you like and help, even if it’s just a little bit. I know some people say that Melatonin makes them feel sluggish the following morning, but this one by Thorne does wonders for my sleep AND how I feel when I wake up. For supermarket stuff, I continue to sing the praises of Sleepytime Extra with Valerian root, sometimes I even steep two tea bags for five minutes (woo!), which knocks me out in a good way. I continue to be a super fan of AGZ Nightly Rest and Restore because it consistently works w/helping me to stay asleep (the chocolate mint flavor is now my top pick). And I’ve recently tried Clevr’s Deep Calm Magnesium (alternating with Magnesium by Thorne), which tastes delicious and is supposed to be good for chilling out any time, not just when you want to sleep (in addition to listing all the ways this product works, they say it “tastes like a raspberry mocktail. Feels like a weighted blanket for your nervous system”). My point here is: Try what you can to see what makes the biggest difference. Plus: I would be remiss in not mentioning that going on HRT has made a difference, too, the lowest dose of Estradiol and Progesterone have made me less irritable/cranky and thus, better equipped for relaxing into sleep/staying asleep. I did a good amount of research beforehand and decided to work with Elektra Health to talk through my HRT needs, which was wildly informative and affordable, too.

6. Get a plant. Just one though.

We have a lot of plants in our small apartment even though I have no idea how I became a plant person. A few of them I’ve rescued off the sidewalk, finding it hard to bear seeing a green thing barely alive awaiting the garbage truck. At one point, a few years ago, I was lying in bed reading and became distracted by the state of the plants in our bedroom. One with yellowing leaves, another lurching out of its pot. I immediately got into it, fussing and pruning.

BAD IDEA.

Too many plants in your bedroom is, in my case, like too many screens or any other thing that has a way of holding your attention hostage…not good. So, at the start of this year, I removed all our bedroom plants except one (a Philodendron ⬆️, I think??, given to me as a gift by ATA reader Robin:), which now acts like she’s the QUEEN, taking over the whole corner by the window. I water her once a week. Like Ophelia the black swan preening over her new eggs, she seems to eagerly show me new shoots every few weeks. And, instead of a distraction in our bedroom at night when I need to be winding down, this one plant brings me ease and beauty. That’s it. If you have too much of something in your bedroom (especially storage under your bed), consider streamlining…a bedroom needs relative simplicity to do its job in setting the tone for deeper sleep, NOT busying your mind.

7. Good sheets make more of a difference than you think.

I used to hate washing and changing my sheets. But since I tend to sweat more at night, specifically NOW when it’s warmer out, I have no choice but to change them more often. And, somehow I realized through the increased frequency, I got my system into a groove. First, putting my favorite sheets front and center and ditching any sets or randos that seemed discolored from age or I never wanted to grab when making the bed. And with limited storage space, the pared back collection makes it so much easier/more fun to grab what I need when I need it. I got Raffi down to two sets of sheets and us down to three—one from Kassatex, one from Quince, and this super-light cotton duvet from Bedsure ⬇️ (we gave some as gifts a few ATAs back:). I’m not sure I ever thought that climbing into bed with freshly washed sheets would become the HEIGHT of luxury for me, but alas, it’s a ritual/investment that pays you back dividends. Oh, and I love a beautiful lightweight coverlet or quilt in summer, too…offering some visual eye candy without too much added heat.

8. Pajamas are clothes, too.

The cutest set from TOAST.

I literally have two pairs of pajama bottoms that I wear with varying vintage T-shirts/tank tops. No big whoop at all. But sometimes, particularly when I’m upstate and sitting outside with coffee listening to the birdies, I want to not look/feel like the college version of me. I will be honest, I don’t suspect wearing fancier pajamas will help you sleep better, but there IS something to this idea of liking what you’re wearing, feeling good in it, and letting that goodness do its magic. My theory w/good pajamas is the same as good sheets—you only need a set or two. These are the ones I like, but the above set from Toast would be nice to wear on a bike ride, too.

Left to right: Mango Striped PJs, Veronica Beard Long-Sleeve Cotton Pajama Set, Eberjey Gisele Cami + Pant Set, SKIMS Polka-Dot Poplin Set, TEKLA Poplin Pyjama Shirt and Shorts (👀almost 50% off!), Cou Cou Intimates Iris Tank w/ The Pant, Papinelle Amelie Oversized PJ Set, GAP Poplin PJ Shirt and Pants, APIECE APART PJ Set.

9. Read something a little witchy before bed.

It is possible that there is no greater sleep aid then reading good writing on paper after a long day. In my experience, I love reading something that allows me to step not only out of my life for a spell but into a space much more dreamy/cerebral. Because I tend to think about people I miss at night (mostly Phoebe lately), I like reading things written about reincarnation and lucid dreaming, giving our subconscious minds some adventure at night. Here are some of my favorites to pick up/put down anywhere in the middle when the spirit moves me…us:).

• Ask Your Guides by Sonia Choquette
• Tibetan Book of Sleep and Dreams by Tenzin Wangyal
• Many Lives Many Masters by Brian L. Weiss M.D.
• Reincarnation by Thich Nhat Hanh
• Lucid Dreaming by Stephen LaBerge
• How to Be An Artist by Jerry Saltz
• Memories Look at Me by Tomas Tranströmer

10. Good-looking fans for smooth/sedating air flow.

Even when we have the AC going, there’s just something about the soothing hum of air moving in place of an actual sound machine (though, those are lovely, too). The Dyson Cool Tower is the OG — it’s on the bigger side but is minimalist in design to sit / fade into a corner. But a petite desk fan perched on a nightstand or windowsill also does the trick for smaller spaces, as do these more industrial/vintage-looking options, which blend in seamlessly.

From left, Vornado/Bed Bath & Beyond, Windmill/Lowe’s, Vornado/West Elm.

11. If you don’t meditate, a bath is a close second.

Nightly baths are a big part of my life. I don’t like booking hotel rooms w/out a bath tub, and when we commenced renovating our Brooklyn apartment, my one big wish was that we could have the deepest tub we could fit/afford. Bath time, particularly in a small apartment, is crucial decompression time. I used to meditate at night, but the last few years, it’s gotten harder for me to keep that ritual. Instead, closing the bathroom door, dimming the lights, getting all my favorite smells and scrubs ready for even just 30 minutes of DO NOT DISTURB time, has become my own version of meditation. And for me, there really is nothing quite like hopping into bed smelling like Susanne Kaufmann’s mountain pine scent. We always keep a stash of Higher Dose Serotonin Soak Salt, which helps a lot during periods when I’m working more and tracking too many details. This Necessaire Body Lotion is pretty lovely, but my most favorite all-in-one serum at night—on face, feet, and hands—is this one by Noto. It’s made of the best ingredients and smells so good, too.

12. Nightstand stuff…the speed round. Keep it edited!

• In the summer months I wake up thirstier than usual, so occasionally I keep a smaller water carafe w/a cup on my nightstand along w/my tea.
• I hate the idea of a phone alarm so for people who need help waking at a certain time, this Wake Table Lamp looks good.
• Our windows aren’t big enough for drapes or curtains, but lightening up the textiles in your bedroom is a nice way to make the mental shift to summer sleep. I like this style from IKEA, but I’ve been eyeing these beautiful sheer panels Nordic Knots just released for our living room. In general, I love how matchstick shades warm and ease up a room, but if you need blackout impact, you can try these, too.

My friend Maria’s house Upstate…aka inspiration for pairing a linen shade w/sheer curtains.

That’s it for today…I’ll be back next week, and if you have any good sleep tips you’ve been living by, go ahead and drop them in the comments. We’re all taking notes. xxCb

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